Polyamory is getting slivers of legal recognition in America

It all began with Dungeons & Dragons. In a club for enthusiasts of the fantasy role-play game, Nate met Ashley and Erik, a married couple. Two years of friendship turned to romance and intimacy: first between Ashley and Nate, then him and Erik. They formed a triad. There was frank talk about commitment, finances and parenting—Ashley and Erik have two children, who now call Nate “bonus daddy”. “There’s a lot of love going on,” he says, as the three adults cosy up on their couch.

In October they held a commitment ceremony resembling a wedding (pictured), albeit with more vows. (“We tried to keep them short,” says Ashley.) The arrangement has no legal weight as a marriage: every state bans bigamy or polygamy. So they signed a “no-nup”: a contract outlining alimony and child-care responsibilities in the event of a break-up or death among partners who were never legally married. Their lawyer, Diana Adams, notarised it with a “lovely stamp that goes ker-chunk”.